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Daily Archives: November 14, 2010

Babies

Day 05–Something you hope to do in your life.

What I hope to do in my life…

I want a family.  I feel like I can’t say this better than Rachael, and my blog title obviously explains my feelings toward housewifery.  I want a family.  I want kids.  I want a husband.  White picket fence.  Nice house.  The works, ya know?

I hope to go to Alaska.  I hope to climb a mountain.  I hope to see Greece.  I don’t know.  None of these things as much as I want a family.  I want to share my husband’s last name and raise my children based on everything I’ve been learning from those raising children around me. I want it so badly sometimes, that I’m afraid I’m jinxing myself, that it will be the one thing I can’t have.

I just pray that I’m a Fertile Myrtle like my momma says I am to calm my fears.  I can think of no greater happiness than having a family of my own.

No other way to put it.  I’m ready.

 

 
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Posted by on November 14, 2010 in Domesticity

 

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Forgiving Someone Else

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

…I forgive most.  I don’t think I’ve truly held a grudge.  I did for awhile.

(((This is all written better in my graduate thesis–ask if you want to read it.)))

When I broke up with a guy, who I will call “B” in January of 2006, he got a girlfriend, and I got a boyfriend (“N”), but it was obvious he wasn’t very happy with me.  In April of that year, I turned 21 years old and went out to the Depot in Fremont, Ohio with a friend to celebrate.  I made it home, and Mom was nice enough to get in the minivan to take my boyfriend home.  On our way out to his house, I had to throw up, so we pulled over at the intersection close to ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend’s house.

“N” dragged me into the car pretty quickly, and I heard him and my mother mumbling about some man coming toward me while I cradled my head in my hands.  After we dropped “N” off, we were driving home the same route.  In a minivan.  My brother called and said that “B”, his father, and his friend were at our house, and that they wouldn’t tell him what they wanted, they wouldn’t come in, and they wouldn’t leave.  Mom was nervous, but we made our way home.  Abiding by the law no less.  A Sheriff pulled us over and told me I was suspect to a crime.  That I had vandalized “B’s” new girlfriend’s car, and that they had seen me checking up on the job when we pulled for me to puke.  Sardines on the roof, sugar in the tank.

After some fighting and yelling with the Sheriff, and me continually swearing that I had a “bar full of alibis!”, we drove home.  I hadn’t done it.

When we got there, they were standing against my garage, all three of them, with their booted feet shoulder-width apart, and their hands crossed over their white t-shirted chests.

“I dumped you.  I don’t care that you have a new girlfriend.  I think she’s nice.  Probably good for you.”

There was a lot of yelling.  The same Sheriff showed up again, told me if I’d just confess, I’d save myself some fines/jail time.

Bullshit.

Now, my parents are still holding this grudge.  I think I realized that I fully had forgiven the situation recently when I texted him without a thought when I’d heard his grandfather had died.

It’s a recent forgiveness.

I’m still working on forgiving all the men who have only become what I wanted them to be AFTER we’d broken up.

 

Those are different stories for different times.

 

Happy Saturday.

 
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Posted by on November 14, 2010 in Daily Happenings

 

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