Picture this (just not in too much detail):
There is a teenager, about to enter Junior High, and she’s freaked. the. hell. out. She does not wear American Eagle and Abercrombie, mostly because she doesn’t want to, and partially because she’s a little chunky. She remembers the days that she used to enjoy school shopping – picking out Lisa Frank notebooks, gel pens, White-Out, and clicky pencils. But what used to be enjoyable has turned into a panicked flurry through the mall to get the school supplies out of the way to finding clothes that fit her, but still look like a teenagers’ clothes.
Luckily, she is in Junior High at the time that the Levi’s Wide Leg jean is making its big appearance. JNCO’s are popular, and Tommy Hilfiger has made it possible to dress baggily and look like you’re in a hip-hop video. But no matter how much she tries to look “hip”, her braces and her big blonde perm set her outside the circle.
At the mall, she is in a dressing room trying on a pair of jeans and her mother is somewhere in the store. Her father and her brother are wandering the mall. And she is having a showdown with herself in the mirror. With the jeans in her hand, she slips one leg in. While her other foot is off the floor, she begins to lose balance and hops. But she doesn’t just hop. She twists and attempts to hold herself up on the wall, but the two motions cause friction and twisting and horror.
Something snaps and the girl is standing in the dressing room with one leg of the new pants halfway up her thigh, and she is standing on this foot now. Her other leg is bare and she is gingerly holding it off of the floor. She is biting her lip, holding herself against the wall of the dressing room braving the look down to see what snapped.
When she looks down, she sees that her knee has separated. Her thigh is going to the right, her shin is going to the left. She thinks of yelling for her mother, or just going out to find her. But she is not wearing pants.
In order to avoid anymore embarrassment, she makes the decision to fix her knee herself. She balances on her good leg, puts her hands on either side of her knee, and bites down. Hard. Then THWAP.
She jams her knee back into place. And it doesn’t hurt…but her whole body is buzzing. She puts on her own pants, walks out of the dressing room, finds her mother, and goes back out to the food court where her brother and father are now waiting.
Said girl eventually takes up running, realizes the knee injury was something more to be considered, and also realizes that one leg is shorter than the other. Check back tomorrow for the follow-up.