When you’re dating or looking for that one you’re going to love forever, there are certain deal breakers. With friends, not so much. I think it’s fun to have a wide variety of friends. But lovers…well. Having been in 4 long-term relationships (all between 16 and 34 months), I’ve encountered my share of deal breakers. So I thought I’d share those over the next few days.
#1 Not Believing in God
I’ve been with one man who didn’t believe in God. It was awful. I’m Catholic, and I’m not one of those uber-devout ones. I go through periods of being an every-weeker to a CEC–a Christmas-Easter Catholic, but that doesn’t stop the believing.
I used to worry about finding another Catholic, but it turns out that it’s not that easy. It turns out that I really don’t care about the denomination of the man that I love, but rather I just care that he believes in God. So at 19 when I was dating a man who I had actually gone to Sacred Heart (a Catholic elementary school) with and he decided that he didn’t believe in God, I was lost.
After every evening I spent with him, I cried myself to sleep hoping that someday he’d find something to believe in.
We ended up breaking up–not based on this deal breaker alone. Years later, I heard that as he stood by his grandfather’s deathbed, listened to him talk to God, and watched him slip away that he walked away a believer.
I’m happy for him.