POST APPOINTMENT UPDATE: I didn’t flip out! My blood pressure was 118/78 and my heart rate was 68 beats per minute. SCORE. Oh, and no death sentence.
My at-rest pulse rate is 62 beats per minute. My blood pressure? I don’t remember the numbers, but it’s pretty darn low. But as soon as I step into a doctors’ office (my pulse is rising right now just writing about it), I go INSANE. I get hypertension. My pulse races. My head gets fuzzy.
It’s true. I have White Coat Syndrome.
Today, I have to go to the doctor. And there’s nothing wrong with me–it’s just a new patient appointment. She’s probably not even going to take my blood pressure…but I am FREAKING out.
I don’t know if you know this, but I hate doctors. Well, hate is a strong word, but I do hate the power that they have over me. I mean, they can look at me and say, “You’ve got 2 months…” and that’s it. I’m done. They’re couriers of bad news.
I have no reason to think that there is something wrong with me. My panic attacks are mostly gone from two summers ago, but I’m not even kidding, my chest is tightening up. And all I have to do is fill out paperwork!
I’ll let you know when I get back if I have 2 months to live.