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Literary Names for Nuggets

I know I know–I’m really digging this baby-naming thing into the ground.  And no, for all of you who like to insinuate–I’m not knocked up.  But everyone around me is and my ovaries are glowing and damnit I want to name something!

And being that I studied literature for 7 years in college (including grad school, assholes), I think that I have to address the fad of naming nuggets after literary characters.  And I can only assume that authors put a lot of thought into naming their characters.  This is one of those instances that I’m sure they look at the meanings of names and base their characters actions off of them.  It’s a good theory.

I always wrote nonfiction, so I never really got to name anything (except unfortunate barn cats)…but I assume that this is how it goes.

There are obvious problems with this–but also obvious advantages.  I mean, people LOVE characters from books, but rules #1:  THEY MUST BE CLASSIC TITLES!  None of this Stephenie Meyers bullshit.  Pick a classic book, like The Great Gatsby or something by Shakespeare.  Or you can name them after the authors themselves…  A little boy named Tennyson would be adorable.  Heck, a little girl named Tennyson would be adorable.  Dylan?  YEAH!

But if you’re going to go literary–author or character–please just don’t make it after a fad.  Make sure that the book is respected, and that it’s going to be around for awhile.  And who cares if it’s controversial–Twain’s a pretty sweet name.

CHEERS!

 
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Posted by on April 4, 2012 in Raising My Youngins

 

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How to Name Your Nugget

First of all–new look to the blog.  You dig?  🙂

Alright, so yesterday in my rant about dead barn cats, I promised to talk about what should go into naming your nugget.  And for those of you who are confused, nuggets are children–from the infant stage to about 3 years old.

But you’re not naming a 3-year-old!  You’re naming infant nuggets, right?  So how do you go about it?  How can you pick the right name?  Is there a right name?  I’m having a panic attack and I’m not even pregnant.

There’s so much to think about–so here’s my advice when picking out a name for your nugget:

Think about whether you really like the name, or it’s a fad. I can’t stand these people naming their children “Bella” and “Edward” simply because they’re Twilight fans…plus, I can’t think of a guy who would let them happen, but apparently, and sadly, it happens.  I was named after Susan Lucci’s character Erica Kane on All My Children...  Ha ha thanks, Ma.  But don’t name them after a fad!  Even if their generation won’t know what the heck movie you are talking about.

Will the name be easy to make fun of?  Because if it is possible to make an mean joke about a name, kids will do it.  And while the possibility of a mean name isn’t a reason to ditch a name completely, it has to be something you think about.

Will the kid have a nickname?  If you name your kid Maximillian, chances are he’s going to be called “Max”.   Think about the ways that the name can be abbreviated…and if you want to start your family and friends calling the kid a nickname.  My very wonderful Jenny’s name isn’t Jenny at all.  In fact, it’s Jean–but very few people call her that.  Think about it!

How will it sound with a middle name that you may be obligated to use?  Middle name, first name, sometimes you just have to pay homage to a relative.  Sometimes that’s good, sometimes that’s bad.  Regardless, think about this.

How will it sound with the kid’s last name?  That’s important!  Even if you like the name Robert, it may not be smart to name a kid Robert Roberts.  See my second point.

What does the name mean…and does that actually have an affect on what the kid is like?  I’m torn on this.  I watch Legends of the Fall and think, “I’m so naming my son ‘Tristan.'”  But then I see kids named Tristan that are the complete opposite of tough–in fact, they’re pretty wimpy.  And I want a tough little boy!  Unfortunately, I don’t think the meaning of a name really changes how a kid acts or grows up–unless the kid is constantly made fun of for the name.

My name means “honorable ruler.”  I like to think I’m honorable…but I’m not sure I can say I’m a ruler.  I do think that name meanings are cool, though, and sometimes knowing what your name means really does make you want to embody that.

So that’s what I’ve got for you on naming your nuggets.  With that said, I already have my children named.  And no–I won’t tell you what they are because you preggers will steal them. 😉

Cheers!  And let me know what you think of the new bloggity!

 
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Posted by on April 3, 2012 in Raising My Youngins

 

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Death of the Barn Cat(s)

Note to Animal Activists and Cat Lovers:  I do not like cats…but I do not hate them.  Also, any death that occurred below was by no means malicious or fruitless.  Mama Cat was taken down by a gun because she attacked everyone who stepped out the front door, and we had 300 kittens running around because she was a whore.

I’ve never really had a real pet.  Therefore, I’ve never really put any thought into naming a living creature.

I had a goldfish called Suzy that I named after my friend’s “cool” older sister.

And I guess I had a few barn cats at my grandparents’ house in Clyde that I got to name:  Strudel (death by combine),  Muffin (cross-eyed, death by car), Bart a.k.a. Barf (death by eating disorder), Salt & Pepper (frozen solid…then thawed and back to life…but not before we threw the box that contained their bodies into a burning barrel), and a few others…  I always chose the runt of the litter–the one that was bound to have issues.  There was Nickel, Kipper, Bear, countless Tigers, Juniors, and Smokes.  A few named Morris after the 9 Lives cat, and one named Pumpkin.  Mama Cat was killed by gun, and her kittens taken to wide open fields.

When we found the bones of a decayed cat in the barn underneath the woodpile, we called her Princess (after Princess Diana who had recently died) and carved her name into a brick.  She still rests under the first pine tree on Grandma and Grandpa’s farm.

But Suzy was eaten by my brother’s fish, Buddy.  And you learn to never get attached to barn cats–there are too many ways for them to go.   So I never really put much stock into what I called these critters.

It seems like a huge responsibility to name something, and I haven’t had much practice.  I people naming their dogs…dogs that are parts of their families.  And now my friends are naming their children.  Whoa, right?  Children.  Children that you have to call by the same name for upwards of 50 years.  Children who will be known by that name for the rest of their lives, on paper, in memories.

I’m not equipped to name anything yet.  It’s just not so…  But I do have theories on naming things…so tomorrow, I will write a segment entitled “How to Name Your Nugget”, and I will talk about it like I have authority on this matter.

Cheers!

 
 

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