Tag Archives: Catholic

Sure, I’ll Talk About Amendment One in NC

But only because I’m a former resident.

I think you all know how I felt about my time in Wilmington, North Carolina.  I enjoyed certain parts of it, but when it came down to brass tracks, I always wanted to go home to the north coast, to Ohio.

I was continuously yelled at and reprimanded for my views, for the men that I dated, for the way I asked about the gender of an unborn child.  My views on sunscreen and the word gypped pissed people off.  Wilmington, North Carolina was a little too willy-nilly for me…and it’s apparently one of the more liberal towns.  Yet everything I said was judged and taken to be offensive, when it reality I think more tolerance could have been practiced.

I’m told that I’d love the western part of the state…which is where I think the majority of the 60% that turned down gay marriage live.  Perhaps I would like some parts of western NC, but I belong in the North.

Sure, I’ll lose some followers when I say this, but I think it’s worth being said.  While I am conservative in many aspects of my life (government, money, etc.), I am much more liberal in the social aspect of things.  And while I may not be way off to the left socially, I do believe that we need to loosen up.

So when Amendment One passed in North Carolina yesterday, I can honestly say I felt some sadness.  I knew plenty of gay and lesbian couples when I lived there.  And while I refuse to get preachy and talk about rights, I will say that I have no problem with the civil union of gay and lesbian couples.  Now, I will also say this–I was raised a Catholic…and I am a conservative…and I AM from Ohio.  It would be dishonest of me to not say that the thought of church weddings in this respect does make me a little antsy.  But gay marriage in general does not.

My friend Daniel married his partner of 15 years on May 8th, 2012 in Washington, DC.  It wasn’t a destination wedding for fun–it was a destination wedding born out of necessity.  And that kinda sucks.

I’m very happy for Daniel and Ben, and for any couple that can unite in love legally.  Someday there will be tolerance.  I believe that whole-heartedly.


Posted by on May 9, 2012 in Daily Happenings


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Giving It Up–for LENT!

Hey ya’ll.  So I want to give up multiple things this year for Lent.  So here’s the list:

  • Cussing
  • Sweets
  • Roseanne
What are you giving up?   (I’m so busy.)

Happy Ash Wednesday!


Posted by on February 22, 2012 in Daily Happenings


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Why I Love Being Catholic

It seems to me that anyone who is Catholic understands that there is stigma around being Catholic.  Sometimes we get annoyed with the rules within our faith, and sometimes we fall back on them–hard.  And we’ve all seen Dogma and know how people perceive the faith.

The truth is that I’m not as strict as I used to be.  At one point during my childhood, I accidentally said “f*ck” (see, I feel bad typing out the whole word in a blog full of faith) and spent the rest of the night begging God not to send me to hell and saying the Rosary over and over again.  I was muttering Hail Mary’s in my sleep and living in fear for months afterward.

And upon dating a very religious Presbyterian, I began noticing the differences between our faiths.  There was nothing wrong with these differences, but rather a symbiotic misunderstanding.  He got further into his faith, I got a little away from mine.  When I graduated high school, he gave me a necklace with a crucifix charm.  I wore it every day, even after we broke up in October of my freshman year.

While sitting in a Creative Writing class my Junior year of college, I was wearing the crucifix necklace.  All of the sudden, Jesus fell off the cross.  Gina, my good Catholic friend who was sitting next to me, said, “That can’t be good…”  It was funny, and a little scary.

But I LOVE being Catholic.

  • I love that the potential for Hell, sinning, and guilt has kept me from doing a lot of bad things.
  • I love that the guilt from doing bad things I’ve done anyway has scared me away from bad habits.
  • I love that we all say the same things at the same time (although it seems cultish to outsiders).
  • I love the Catholic Calisthenics, the stand sit kneel sit stand dance.
  • I love that Catholics can pick each other out in a crowd.
  • I love that we can poke fun at ourselves one minute and then defend our faith the next.
  • I love the crucifix.
  • I love the stained glass.
  • I love Lent.
  • I love Dogma.
  • I love that, “I’m Catholic” draws the response, “Oooh” from so many people.

I am by no means a strict Catholic, but I will cite the beliefs and statutes in my everyday speech.  I wish I went to church every Sunday.  I felt better when I did.  Maybe I ought to start that again.  In college at Ashland University, I went every Sunday night with my friends, Dan and Rachel.  In North Carolina, I was afraid to go alone, but when I found St. Mary’s, it felt like going home again.  When I moved back to PA and started having panic attacks, I went back to church.  But between all the moving and traveling every weekend to this place or the next, I just don’t go anymore.

I need to get back to it.


Posted by on June 8, 2011 in Daily Happenings


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Lovin’, Touchin’, Baby Squeezin’

I did a fair share of baby squeezing at Mike’s sister’s graduation party this weekend.  Grady, Brennan, Carter, and loads and loads of toddlers.

And they’re all so stinkin’ cute, dangit.  SO stinkin’ cute.  There’s just something about holding a little tiny baby to my heart that makes my ovaries glow.

This is baby Brennan about 4 months ago:

Don’t you just wanna squeeze him!?  I’m waiting for pictures of Mike and I with Grady.  We took some, family photo style.

Of course holding babies makes me want babies (deja vu?), but at the same time, it also makes me realize how unprepared I am for them.  Minus the fact that I do not have a husband, I also live in a one bedroom apartment, with a multitude of student loans, and a tendency to not want to spend money on anything.  I haven’t been to the grocery store in a month.

They say there’s no perfect time to have a baby.  But I do have a few requirements before I have one.

Before I Have A Baby, I Will…

  1. Have a husband
  2. Live in the same town as him.
  3. Have more than one bedroom in my house
  4. Be less afraid of/hateful toward grocery shopping
  5. Not be afraid to log into my bank account (this began in grad school, when I was poor)
  6. Be more involved in my church (Catholicism tends to scare you into behaving, and guilt you if you screw up.  I love it.)

And Ideally, I will…

  1. Drink less wine
  2. Own a puppy, you know, to practice
  3. Have my parents living a little bit closer so I don’t have to pay for daycare
  4. Have a big old farmhouse with a lot of land so that my babies can grow up with summer feet
  5. Be able to fly my kids all over the country to see the awesome people I’ve met along the way

There is far more to this.  But for now, this will do.  So go do some lovin’, touchin’, and baby squeezin’.  You owe it to yourself!


Posted by on June 6, 2011 in Domesticity


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Catholic Guilt–Forgiving Myself for Saying Fuck

I have a tough conscience.  One that’s even tougher on me than anyone else’s judgment.

One that made a little girl say the Rosary at least fifteen times as she fell asleep the night she asked her mom what “fuck” meant, and why it had been written on the teeter totter at Sacred Heart School.  Beneath the light pink sheets and lavender comforter, she whispered Hail Mary’s between the lips that had spoken the word.  She couldn’t stop her tongue from wrapping around the words while she pleaded for forgiveness.  Repentance turned to repetition, to guilt.  With her fingers sliding over bead after bead, she reminded herself that she had said “the worst word in the world,” and for it, she would face certain eternity in Hell.

This, of course, was before I knew that there were worse words to say, and far worse things to do.

Day 3:  Something you have to forgive yourself for.

This one bothers me.  Something I have to forgive myself for?  Does that mean something that I’ve already forgiven myself for?  Or something that I’m still fighting with?

I bet it’s the one I don’t want to deal with.  I bet it’s the one I’m still fighting with…the one I haven’t forgiven myself for…

These questions make you realize how monumentally open the web is.  How open you are.  To everything.

For years after preschool, I felt horrible about snapping at my teacher.  Miss Missy (yes, that was her name and she was awesome.  I can still remember her perfume) tried to help me tie my shoe one time.  I must have been fussy, because I covered my laces, looked her in the eye and said, “I can do it.”  I couldn’t do it…but she sat there and watched me attempt it for God knows how long.  When I turned 18, I apologized to Miss Missy for this.  Of course she didn’t remember it, but she gave me a hug, and in the midst of the same warm arms and same perfume I had smelled 16 years prior, I forgave myself.

But that’s obviously an example of the first one.  Not the bad one.

…I still need to forgive myself for losing sight of some of my Catholic values.  This past summer, I went through a pretty dreadful bout of Catholic guilt…which is normal people guilt, only multiplied by at least 20.  If you’ve been reading my blog for awhile, you know about this dreadful period of my life.  There is no need for details, but perhaps I will share them with you when I’ve actually forgiven myself.

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Posted by on November 12, 2010 in Daily Happenings, When I Was Young


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