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On Wedding Showers / Bachelorette Parties / Receptions

Let’s face it.  Over the past 5 years, I’ve been to a helluva lot of wedding showers, bachelorette parties, weddings, and receptions because I’m one of the very few people in my circle of friends that hasn’t taken that dive into adulthood yet.

And I’ll be honest–each one ignites a small green flame of jealously in me.  But each one also brings a landslide of ideas of do’s and don’ts for when my time comes.

I realize that each person is different, and that each event should be tailored to the people in which they honor.  So just because something isn’t my style doesn’t mean it’s not theirs.  But all these showers/parties/receptions have left me making lists for my own.  Of course I can’t plan my own shower or party, but I do have some suggestions for whoever is involved when the time comes:

The Wedding Shower

  • NO GAMES.  NONE.  No one wants to list silly facts about me.  No one wants to answer questions.  No one really cares how we got to where we are–just that we are there.  I’ll give all my guests favors should you desire compensation for coming to my shower.
  • Food:  We’re grilling out.  Burgers, hot dogs, and veggie burgers.  And plenty of fixin’s and sides.
  • Drink:  Alcohol.  Because let’s be honest. You’ll have more fun, and so will I.
  • Place:  Outside.  Duh, we’re grilling.  Let’s have a bonfire!
  • Presents:  Appreciated, of course.  And I will not be offended if you are not interested in watching me open them.
  • Boys:  NONE…during the shower.  I want the guys to drop off their ladies and head to a local bar.  Then I want them to come back when the shower is over, eat the rest of the food, move/pack up the presents, and continue drinking.  Why not just make the shower a party?
  • Get a little crazy. 🙂  Why not tent camp?
  • EDIT:  Jenny would like me to inform you that there will be funny hats.  Lots of them.

The Bachelorette Party

These always make me nervous.  The truth is that I just don’t want my bridesmaids/family/etc. to have to spend a bunch of money to have a party for me.  So here’s what I want:

  • All the ladies meet at someone’s house to do some pregaming.  Pregaming = cheaper than drinking in a bar.
  • We can do this for 1 hour or 5 hours.  I don’t really care.
  • Take me to one bar.  That’s it.  I don’t really want to go anywhere crazy.  If we’re in Fremont, let’s make it the Depot.  Otherwise–let’s find some beer specials.
  • I’m fine with strippers so long as they don’t touch me with their junk.
  • I will wear typical bachelorette party attire.
  • If you’re going to provide me with dirty gifts, do it at the house before we go to the bar. 🙂

The Reception

Now this…this I do have some control over, and I’ll keep it a surprise for those of you who will be there.  The rest of you will have to rejoice in pictures someday. 🙂

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Posted by on August 29, 2012 in Daily Happenings, The Book of Love

 

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Sure, I’ll Talk About Amendment One in NC

But only because I’m a former resident.

I think you all know how I felt about my time in Wilmington, North Carolina.  I enjoyed certain parts of it, but when it came down to brass tracks, I always wanted to go home to the north coast, to Ohio.

I was continuously yelled at and reprimanded for my views, for the men that I dated, for the way I asked about the gender of an unborn child.  My views on sunscreen and the word gypped pissed people off.  Wilmington, North Carolina was a little too willy-nilly for me…and it’s apparently one of the more liberal towns.  Yet everything I said was judged and taken to be offensive, when it reality I think more tolerance could have been practiced.

I’m told that I’d love the western part of the state…which is where I think the majority of the 60% that turned down gay marriage live.  Perhaps I would like some parts of western NC, but I belong in the North.

Sure, I’ll lose some followers when I say this, but I think it’s worth being said.  While I am conservative in many aspects of my life (government, money, etc.), I am much more liberal in the social aspect of things.  And while I may not be way off to the left socially, I do believe that we need to loosen up.

So when Amendment One passed in North Carolina yesterday, I can honestly say I felt some sadness.  I knew plenty of gay and lesbian couples when I lived there.  And while I refuse to get preachy and talk about rights, I will say that I have no problem with the civil union of gay and lesbian couples.  Now, I will also say this–I was raised a Catholic…and I am a conservative…and I AM from Ohio.  It would be dishonest of me to not say that the thought of church weddings in this respect does make me a little antsy.  But gay marriage in general does not.

My friend Daniel married his partner of 15 years on May 8th, 2012 in Washington, DC.  It wasn’t a destination wedding for fun–it was a destination wedding born out of necessity.  And that kinda sucks.

I’m very happy for Daniel and Ben, and for any couple that can unite in love legally.  Someday there will be tolerance.  I believe that whole-heartedly.

 
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Posted by on May 9, 2012 in Daily Happenings

 

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A Mapper’s Wedding Ring

About three times I week, I lose myself in internet fancy and start staring at big-stoned wedding rings.   I rarely look at men’s rings because frankly, they’re not so exciting.  But I found this one today:

For those of you who may not know me, my boyfriend is a mapper.  Not the Christopher Columbus, track the stars, wear stockings and a three-pointed hat kind of mapper, but rather a real-life one that actually makes maps of Pennsylvania and loves the land.

Which is why he needs to marry me ASAP so I can buy him this ring!  Whatdya say, Mike? 😉

 
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Posted by on March 6, 2012 in Daily Happenings

 

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I. Met. David. Tutera!

Oh. My. God.  Yes, that’s David Tutera.  WITH ME.

Mom and I got to meet him on Monday at about 10:30 a.m.  I gave him a hug.  We talked for about 10 minutes, during which I told him that I wanted him to be my “something blue” on my wedding day and handed him a bridal handkerchief with a blue bow on it.

David said, “Can I sign it?!”  OF COURSE YOU CAN!

So now, when I get married, even though I may not be able to get David Tutera to plan my wedding, I will have a little piece of his pizzazz and style with me as my something blue.  I am so excited!  I’ll post pictures of the handkerchief later, but for now…  DUN DUN DUN!

I just really want to thank Kort, Chris, Phyllis, Jeannie, Mary Kay, and anyone else who was involved with making this happen.  I’m so lucky to have gotten to meet him.  ***SQUEAL***

 

 
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Posted by on February 21, 2012 in Daily Happenings, The Book of Love

 

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I’m Going to Meet DAVID TUTERA

It’s freaking true!!!  I am going to meet celebrity wedding planner DAVID TUTERA!

That man.  Oh that man!  He’ll be in Ohio soon, and I am going to meet him thanks to my wonderful friends.  Details and a post after!

 
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Posted by on February 15, 2012 in The Book of Love

 

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“A Good Wife Always Knows Her Place” Hell, even I don’t believe that.

My friend Greg sent me this yesterday.  You can click it to see it a little bit bigger.

Click to see the larger version

Now, I’m sure you all know that I long for some sort of return to the 1950’s housewife…but in order for you to see (ahem, Jarvis) that I am somewhat level-headed about gender roles, women’s rights, and all that bullshit, I will say this:

About 1/4 of the things on this list are CRAP.

  • For instance:  Eliminating all noise?  Pfff.  A noisy house is a happy house.  It’s kind of on par with what Roseanne says in her sitcom when someone walks into her house:  “Excuse the mess, but we live here.”  Damn straight.
  • Second instance of crap:  “Listen to him.  You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time.  Let him talk first–remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.”  HA HA HA.  My ass.
  • Third instance:  “Don’t complain if he’s late for dinner or even if he stays out all night.  Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.”  Ha.  Yeah, that’s how you enable him to cheat.  Letting him go out without question.
  • Fourth crappier instance:  “Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes.  Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.”  He’s not a child–he’s a man.  And although there’s a fine line between the two, he can take off his own damn shoes.
  • CRAPPIEST instance:  “You have no right to question him.”  My ass.  I do, so.

So you can all shut up about me single-handedly setting us women back to the 1950’s.  I only wanna go 3/4 of the way back.

 
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Posted by on December 14, 2011 in Domesticity

 

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Why are the longest workdays…

the ones before haircuts?

I’m going tonight to get my hair done.  And I don’t know why, but it’s always such a big decision–even if I don’t get much done!  Any of you other women get extremely anxious when you have to decide what to do with your hair?

This chick kinda looks like I did when I was a wee one.

I kinda want to do something different.  I kind of don’t.

I really liked it short the last time I cut it, but part of me wants to start growing my hair.

This is where it gets different…MIKE, IF YOU ARE READING THIS, QUIT READING NOW!

Really, go away.

Mike, leave.

Are you gone?

Ok.

I’d grow my hair out…no questions asked…if I knew that I was going to be getting married soon.  I want to be able to put my hair up.  But as that is not happening in the near future, I feel like I should cherish my time with my short hair.  PLUS, my hair looks kinda creepy and scraggly when it’s long, especially without a professional to do it for me every day.  Ugh.  What to do!

 
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Posted by on December 8, 2011 in Daily Happenings

 

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