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Deal Breaker # 5: Momma’s Boys and Their Overbearing Moms

Disclaimer:  I’ve dated some boys whose mothers were/are amazing (Momma O. and Mike’s momma Terry are among them!).  So if I’ve dated your son and you’re reading this blog, I’m not necessarily talking about you…but I could be.  And if I’ve dated YOU and you’re reading this, and you’re upset that I talked about your mom, QUIT BEING SUCH A MOMMA’S BOY!

I’m a firm believer that when you date or marry an individual, you are also dating/marrying the family (unless they are completely estranged from them).

And I don’t know how I do it, but I’ve found a lot (read:  A LOT) of momma’s boys…boys who care more about what their mother thinks than anything else, and mothers who can’t get the picture to get out of their sons’ lives.

Let me give you some examples of overbearing mothers (all different) I’ve encountered:

  • Going so far as to yell at me for fighting with her son
  • Telling me that the only way her boy would marry me is if I got knocked up
  • Stalking me on Facebook because I hurt her boy’s feelings
  • Complaining that her boy spent too much money on my birthday gift
  • Telling me that I’d never be as important to him as his car
  • Bitching at me for not cooking her son a birthday cake–“How was I ever going to take care of him?”
  • Yelling at me for not giving her any time to be alone with her son
  • Glaring at me in line at the local Wal-mart long after her son and I broke up (this is lots of moms)
  • Trying to get me to take lingerie on my vacation with her son and telling me that if he’s as good a lay as his father, I ought to consider myself lucky

Yeah.  PUKE.

And boys caring more about what their momma thinks?  ANNOYING.  I blame the mothers.  Just because they can’t let go doesn’t mean that they ought to be sabotaging their sons’ relationships or still trying to control them.

So if you encounter a momma’s boy, save yourself the trouble and RUN.  It’ll be a HUGE deal breaker.

 
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Posted by on January 18, 2012 in The Book of Love

 

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Shopping Success

We did it!  Mom and I have almost every single present bought for Christmas.  And wrapped!  The tree looks awesome.  I’ll get a picture of it when I go home next weekend.  I had so much fun with her, and with my poppa.  They’re the best.  Plus an unbeatable sale at the Gap.

I have a lot on my mind today.

I’m thankful that something worked out in my favor, and that an honest mistake was understood.

I’m excited to see Mike tonight.

I’m nervous for tomorrow.

I’m exhausted and ready for Christmas.

I’m high on carpet glue from the remodel ha ha.

And I’m hungry, so I’m going for sushi.

Later people.

 
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Posted by on December 5, 2011 in Daily Happenings

 

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Know what makes a good Friday?

Knowing your darling Momma is watching Friday Night Lights in your apartment, and cleaning up as she goes.

Having lunch with your darling Momma.

Going to a Browns game tonight with your darling Momma.

Seeing your boyfriend later on tonight.

Going home to Fremont.

And seeing a brand new baby boy named Jax.

 
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Posted by on August 19, 2011 in Daily Happenings

 

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A Formal Request – From Mom

This weekend, my mother put in a formal request for grandchildren.  Upon seeing one of the women she graduated with at a department store on Mother’s Day, and looking at the pictures of her grandchildren on her cell phone, my mother smacked me and said, “I’m still waiting.”  That’s about as formal as one can be while requesting grandchildren.

And as we walked past the children’s department and all the onesies with duckies and flowers and balloons, she gave me puppy dog eyes, and for once, the roles were reversed.

Children are the ones that usually want things from their parents – in 4th grade it was black high-tops, in junior high it was NIKE everything, in high school it was American Eagle, and in college it was eating money.  Not to mention all the requests for certain foods from the grocery store, electronics, time time time.  Kids always want things from their parents.

And in return, parents just want their children to grow up right, to lead good lives, and to learn to support themselves…  Until you’re 26, and you’ve accomplished those things, and they look at you and say, “So, what’s next?”

For 26 years, my parents gave me things – things I wanted, asked for, things I didn’t want or ask for but needed, things and things and things.  They were always giving and never asking for anything in return.  And it’s weird to think now that only my brother and I can give them what they want next (not my brother and I together, of course, but with our significant others).  Both of my parents want grand kids.

I told her I could have her one in about 9 months, but I think she prefers I get married first.  And call me old-fashioned, but I prefer that, too.  I’d love to give my parents grandchildren.  I’d love to give myself children.  I’d love to give a man children.

It’s just not in the cards right now.  😦

 
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Posted by on May 9, 2011 in Domesticity

 

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“Hi, My Hooty!”

If there’s one thing I can count on, it’s this:

When I come home to my parents’ house, whether it’s from North Carolina, Pennsylvania, or Cleveland, I can always count on my mom standing at the front door, her shoulders pulled up around her smiling face as she holds her arms out and says, “Oh!  Hi, my Hooty!”

Mom and I when I graduated from Ashland

And then I hug her, and she starts asking me if I want anything to eat.  🙂  She’s truly a great mom.

When I was little, I wanted to be like her, to drink coffee out of McDonald’s cups and to paint my nails.  So we initiated “Girl Talk” once a week, and she would buy me a hot chocolate (in the McDonald’s cup) and paint my nails.  I wonder how obnoxious I was then, and wonder how she could bear to play along with me like that all the time.  But then I remember that she’s a darn good mom.

So here’s a list of some of the things I love about my mom (not all of them, of course, because I don’t have that kind of time!):

–  “Hi, my Hooty!”

–  Girl Talk nights.

–  Her ability to extinguish my anxiety.

–  The way she waves goodbye from the kitchen window any time my brother, my father, or I leave.

–  That her first grade picture looks identical to mine.

–  Her excitement about McDonald’s coffee (all 3 of ’em a day 😉 )

–  How she always did without so that her kids could have more than they deserved.

–  The way she won’t “let” you go to sleep without saying “I love you.”

–  Her chicken crescent squares.

–  The way she sneaks money into my account sometimes–EVEN THOUGH SHE DOESN’T NEED TO.

–  That I can tell her anything.

–  How two beers makes her tipsy.

–  That she’s the best euchre partner around.

–  That she still takes “Little Man” off her drinks sometimes.  Ha ha!

–  Her hands.  I want her hands.

–  Her willingness to help people, even when she’s burnt out.

–  Her patience, with me, and with life in general.

–  That she goes to Bon Jovi concerts with me.

–  That she sends me cards, even though I’m only an hour and a half away.

–  Our Christmas shopping trips.

–  The names of the colors she puts in her hair.

I love most that I see her in me.  I do things and think, “That’s what mom does” or “Wow, I did that just like her.”  But there’d be nothing better than turning out like her.

I know you read this sometimes, so I love you, Mom!

 
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Posted by on March 16, 2011 in Daily Happenings

 

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